Tuesday, 28 February 2012

Ten on Tuesday

1. Willow has entered that 'hitting phase'....humph. Not a fan of a lovely little girlie who likes to hit. I am getting lots of practise at my best cross face.

2. Purple tulips brightening up my day.

3. I listened to a fascinating conversation with Richard Holloway on radio 4 yesterday. I tried to put a link to it, but annoyingly iplayer says that half hour of radio is unavailable. So sadly I can't share it with you, but it was a really thought provoking conversation about religion and belief. One lady on there, a former Nun in the catholic church, commented how belief can be egotistical....... 'This is what I believe, what I stand for'  Really made me stop. and think. I have a strong faith and many beliefs, but have come to question more and more the dogma and egotism that can be attached to these things in organised religion. 
So those are my deep thoughts for the week !! If the link becomes available i'll share it soon. It was on 'start the week' monday 9.30pm. Radio 4.

Now back to more important matters of flowers and ice cream...........

4. Poppies are one of my favourite flowers, looking forward to planting these ( and hopefully seeing them grow very soon )

( yes I have just put a photo of a packet of seeds on my blog.........point 6 might explain lack of creativity this week ! )

5. So then pancake day came and went and now it's lent. Lent is a funny old one isn't it. To fast and then tell everyone about it, or not ! mmmmmm ........Hoping to find a way to connect with my Jesus and what He went through during this time. Not sure how though, and knowing me I will be still asking this question in 4 weeks time when it's a little bit late.

6. I've had a cold for 3 weeks now, and a few unexpected things occurred during the last few days which has knocked me off my tight rope walk of balancing activity and rest....time to climb back on the tightrope me thinks. BORING.

7. I am still confused ( and to be honest, a bit annoyed) as to why 'winnie the pooh' was called that name, cos yes he has a 'H' at the end, but it is still the same word as 'Poo'. I find myself saying to Willow, ' shall we go upstairs and find poo ' now that is just a bit gross really isn't it ?1 Of course our pilgrimage is for the yellow bear with his trusty red t-shirt, but still, I do wish he was called something else.

8. Accompanying my sister to try on wedding dresses this saturday - VERY excited. 

9. Pizza for tea tonight in our house.......I wonder what people did before pasta, pizza and pesto graced our shores with their tasty presence ? I guess that's why people ate a lot of this ....

errrrgh gross.

10. While on the topic of food, I ate quite a lot, in fact a very big lot of ice cream on saturday night. It is my biggest vice, ( well there is cake, but I don't think of that as a vice, as it has eggs and flour in it so that's nutritious right ?) the creamy sweet, frozen foodstuff...........my top three favourites are ........Baileys haagen daaz , toffee ice cream  ( not picky about the brand) and carte noir -raspberry pavlova.......... D . L icious.  Husbando sometimes buys me a pot of ice cream instead of flowers. He knows me well.

Linking in with 





sorry I forgot the links last week .

Sunday, 26 February 2012

Love and Marriage

Marriage, not something I mention much on this here blog. I am hurtling towards our 6th anniversary of getting wed. So I guess, has made me stop and think a little.

We met and married fairly quick, in just over a year, but it kind of felt like we'd always known each other. while at the same time, kind of like we were complete strangers. In some ways our marriage has been a bit different from others, 'in sickness and in health' kind of had real meaning when we made those vows, as I was ill when we tied the knot. And after we got married, my health got worse. I spent most of the first year of our marriage in our flat. Occasionally going out, but missed out on those social occasions that are kind of fun to go to together when you're first married, especially as you get to go home together after. Colin ( the husbando) was, and still is a total legend. At the age of 23 he spent lots of time missing out on what people his age are doing, socialising and going on weekends away and stuff, instead sitting in while I was in bed, often not even up and sitting on the sofa with him. Looking back, it was bleak, really bleak. But that wonderful hazy love kind of got us through.

For us, holidays are tricky, cos if your ill you can't work, so have less money, and places you go on holiday for free or cheap are great if you have energy to go out, walk in the countryside and do things which don't cost much but do require energy. So, well, holidays are my favourite thing as it gets me out of the four walls I am currently residing, but for him, it's just moving somewhere without computer, and things to do while I'm in bed. A bit dull I guess.

But we have had a laugh as well, we have had soooo many picnics in our car cos I'm unable to walk somewhere more picturesque. We've discovered box sets to watch we otherwise wouldn't have.
We did have a brief canoeing holiday a while back, well, I sat in the canoe and he did the paddling. That was lovely and the sun shone too.

But our desire to go skiing together, climb a mountain together are all still there. Maybe one day ?
Our desire ( well more mine that his) to have loads of kids is sadly looking less likely now. We are hugely blessed with one, and another one would be the cherry on the cake. But unless I get fully better, my dream of 4 kidlets is defiantly seeming less and less likely.

Most marriages have their pressures though, if it's not poor health, it's something else. Life is rarely easy for anyone. And I'm learning this more and more. It's so easy to look at people and see that they don't have the struggles you do, but you usually don't have to look too deep, to see they have their battles, they are just different. It's a humbling thing to realise.

Then there are the things which the CFS monster hasn't touched. There is the gripe of the socks on the floor,( the toilet seat thing has never bothered me ) the lovely presents I have received, the forgiveness for stupid things said, and the times when I have looked at the fallen expression when I've said something so cutting, that I wish I could just take back.
And of course the hilarious moments of broken down cars, being locked out of houses, Christmases, Birthdays etc. All the usual things.

 Every couple likes to think they are just a bit unusual, but to be honest, we really aren't. We are fairly run of the mill. We argue a bit, but not lots, we love each other, but annoy each other too.

And after 6 years I look across a room at him and think, 'man you are gorgeous', along with 'man I have lived with you for 6 years, but you still surprise me, and at times shock me too ! '

Marriage, is for a long time isn't it ? For life, what have we done ey  ..............6 years is just the start !

Thursday, 23 February 2012

Week in Pictures

This week, they're all about the girl....mostly.
But she's my girl and I love her !


 With her 'choo choo' 

watching watching...

Did a bit of makin' ( not really classed as bakin')

Dressed and ready for action.

 Building building

Posing for the camera..

And lastly, we made a bed for teddy, wasn't quite prepared for what happened when I returned to the room .....
Ted's bed + One .

Tuesday, 21 February 2012

Ten on Tuesday

1. Little tyke has moved into a 'i'm nearly 18 months and have a very cute voice stage.' Having spent a fair ammont of my life nannying and babysitting other people's kids, I knew before I had a baby that I would love this age. It's the time when that oh so cute voice comes out with words, often in the wrong context, and when in the right context, it is just so very sweet, and kind of takes you by surprise.
She is well and truly there. Having been saying for the last few weeks to her ' which shoes shall we put on you today, the purple ones or the red ones? ' ( the luxury of not having to rush anywhere and only having one child....plenty of time for a running commentary of the day ) I hadn't thought for a minute that she was actually listening. Then yesterday, as clear as anything, she picked up her purple shoes and passed them to her Daddy and said 'purple'.  in a high pitched sing songy voice. Adorable.

2. My longue wall was painted ............Thankyou husbando. You are great. Really great, for many reasons and this is just one of them.

3. Went out for a dig in the garden this week, did a very little bit of planting things in the mud. Loved every minute. It is just amazing that I plant something which looks a bit like a dead twig in the mud, and in a few months sure enough a beautiful flowering plant will emerge.........love love love it.

4. So then, this greek money crisis business, please will someone just sort it out ! I don't care who, but surely these talks have been going on long enough now ?

5. Aldi's tealoaf is delicious. You should try it.

6. My brother sent me this linky a few weeks ago, thought it was great. Puts a fresh slant on the meaning of 'sharing' ............

I really like this song anyway, but this cover is brilliant. Although the guy on the far right looks a bit redundant til half way through !

7. We are going to a wedding in a few weeks, I would kind of like a backless cocktail type dress, something a bit fun, a kind of classic 50's style with a full skirt which comes below the knee. Being on a tight budget I typed it into ebay to see if there was one on there. Type ........' backless red cocktail dress' into google and you get a whole other type of dress !! And one problem with being tall, is that a short dress on me is kind of indecent. I'm not scared of flashing a little bit of leg, but I do draw the line at a full on bum cheek. Nuff said.

8.  Today, Little tike and I went on our weekly trip to costa, didn't have camera,( no i don't have a smart phone ) but if I had you would see a clear plastic costa cup, half filled with water, with 3 small yellow rubber ducks bobbing about in it, and plenty of water on the table, floor and chair. It was a wonderful moment where I could see her little creative mind wirring around. Water + ducks = fun.  (even if they are plastic and the water is in a cup ) I chose not to intervene and I 'm glad I didn't. She had fun, I drank tea and enjoyed a moment of watching the little brain I helped create, thinking, imagining and experimenting. Wonderful.

9. Shoes, I need to mention shoes.......I haven't bought a new pair for a while, I think it's time that happened soon. Could I just get rid of  1/2 an inch from my big toes please ? then I could buy some prettier ones. Thankyou.

10. A wonderful friend of mine surprised us with a delivery from ocado this week, containing four ready meals. (the very delicious 'could be home made' posh type) And some other tasty treats too. Good friends are hard to find aren't they ? I seem to have found a few, and feel very blessed, spoilt, and thankful for them.

Saturday, 18 February 2012

A little dream fulfilled.........

My child, with me, in the kitchen, baking, making mess and eating raw eggshell........that last point was not in the initial dream.

Friday, 17 February 2012

Week in pictures

Only a few this week from me, as there's not been much clickady clicking taking place. 

But when you look on the National Geographic photography website, it kind of makes you think there isn't much point in taking any more photos, as theirs are just so damn beautiful. It's a wonderful website, If you like beautiful photography i'd recommend a visit.
This are just one or two of their offerings.....

'One foggy day in Italy'

Don't know about you, but i'd love to swim in this pool !......

Anyway, back to week in pictures....If you fancy looking at the msnbc website for their week in pictures, click here.

This photo from below is from last week's entry, look at this for Ice ! In lake geneva...... nature is just phenomenal isn't it.........?

And here are a few of my humble offerings.....

Signs of life.....

Beautiful bulb, almost too pretty to put in the ground.......

Thursday, 16 February 2012

NHS and M+Ms

Today I am more than a little sleepy, having been out for an early tea with some lovely mummy friends ( without the kids  ) and then not slept very well, due to annoying sore shoulder I am feeling a bit, well, drugged to be honest.

This week has been a funny old one, more than a few trips to the hospital for reasons I might go into another time, and a clinic appointment today at the CFS service. ( I have been waiting for the appointment for months and months - today was the day ) Have all contributed to a rather 'NHS heavy' week.

As expected, the lady I saw basically said that I am managing my condition very well ( gold star for me ), and need to keep doing it, and hope for the best..........................But not expect full recovery anytime soon. So there you have it, an encouraging, (albeit slightly less hopeful) prognosis from a health care professional than I had hoped for.

One thing I do need to vent about slightly is this..... I was referred into the CFS service initially about 7 years ago. And amongst other things they said under NO CIRCUMSTANCES must one with CFS sleep in the day, cos it messes your body clock up. I was more than a little baffled by this, as a brief sleep in the day is what was getting me through. Anyway, true to form, obedient old me followed advice and fought my way through without a sleep for YEARS. Eventually I realised that I actually slept better at night if I had a brief sleep in the day, so threw caution to the wind and incorporated a nap or two every so often into my rather odd way of life. However today I discover that 7 years on, the service has developed and evolved and hey presto,  ' a sleep for an hour a day won't do you any harm' ............THANKYOU ! I knew it wouldn't. Trying not to feel annoyed about this issue, and have to say I am learning that listening to your instincts is more often than not, the way to go.

Being told you are good at managing your condition, and already putting into practise all the advice they have to give you, is very nice in one way. But at the same time, I was hoping for some new revolutionary discovery which could actually........wait for it..........make me reach 100% recovery. Alas my hopes were too lofty.

So for now, I will drag my tired little behind, off to bed, and enjoy the memory of my little outing out last night with the girls, and eat a big old bag of peanut M+Ms......they are a large part of my recovery don't you know.

Tuesday, 14 February 2012

Ten on Tuesday

1. Today is valentines day, and for the first time since we've been married we both kind of forgot. But we have the week together, so I guess it just didn't feel necessary to send a card or a gift....? has the romance died? I think not, but maybe I'm wrong and this is a sign of things to come???! Oh dear me.

2. I have a real dislike of those phrases you see tweeted or written on a plaque. Like 'follow your dreams bla bla bla' yes I am ranting...... I recently read one which said... 'You are not a product of your circumstances, just your decisions' pah, tell that to a child in DRC who's starving and has watched their mother repeatedly tortured. I think there will be things in their circumstances which kind of produce things in them which will never be reversed. and decisions are a luxury the vast majority of people don't have. 
I understand the sentiment behind these things, but they either make you feel bad cos your not achieving/fulfilling those wistful dreams you had as a teenager, or feel smug cos you are ! I am a big fan of having dreams, and hopes. But a plaque somewhere needs to say that sh*t happens, and you know, you need to find Joy in the day your in right now. Your dreams might not come to pass, but that's not necessarily something you can do anything about. 
Rant over.

3. On a less frustrated note, as we drove past the garden centre near ours today, Little Tike said from the back of the car, 'amnaaaals' as she pointed to the garden centre. Yes there are animals there which we go and see......Man that girl is learning quickly.

4. ' Faaam' is how little tike says ' farm '. And her favourite programme 'small potatoes' has an episode set on a farm, she loves it. So heck, why not have a look..... check about 40 seconds in. Gotta love a bit of a hillbilly type inspired song.

5. We have started watching the series 'homeland' it is really good. But like most things I am not looking forward to the second series, cos it's never as good. I would recommend the first ones, it's like a slower paced 24, with a good strong female lead character. Claire Danes, I've always liked her, I think it's cos she played Juliet in Baz Lurnamn's Romeo and juilet, one of my favourite films. ( It also gave me hope as a teenager - that there was a movie star that was as flat chested as me ! )

6. I have had lots of ideas for making, painting, collaging recently....mmmmm wonder if any of those ideas will materialise ? chances are slim me thinks.

7. Cake. We need to talk about cake...... It's been a while since I've eaten a good cake. I love cake, and since having the Little Tike there just hasn't been energy for baking. Not sure how Husbando would react if he came home from work and on top of all the things he does around the house, I had not done the few things that I usually do cos 'sorry love, I baked a cake'..... well unless it was a chocolate cake. But to be honest I prefer a fruit based cake, or carrot or coffee, or walnut etc etc etc, but chocolate cake, not so much.

I need to reverse this situation. I need more cake.

8.  We have a travelling fair type thingy parked up near our house. Little Tike is more than a little taken with the lights. Having spent the past 3 days watching them go round and round and up and down from the window, we made her dreams come true, and wandered over and had a look round. Yes she loved it. And yes I bought some of this.... tasty

9. There is a rumour in my house, that tomorrow is the day my longue wall will be painted my chosen shade of grey. I will keep you posted of this development.

10. My sister is still getting married, now there is talk of dresses, flower girls - (yes that will be my daughter, and yes she will be cute, and probably not walk where she is meant to) and a hen weekend. My little sister, all grown up. What a catch she is. She is seriously gorgeous outside and in. 

Speed on over to the other '10 on tuesdayers' if you fancy a goosey gander.




Sunday, 12 February 2012


Today I am thankful for a few things and here they are.....

That Willow has taken to sleeping in til about 8am. She has been doing this for a while now, and it is pretty nice. It's one of those things you don't really want to tell anyone incase it stops. But for now, I'm just going to be thankful for it. And extra hour I don't need energy for makes a huge difference to my life.

Our family. We had some sad news in our house this week, and someone bought us a delicious Marksandspencers posh meal dine in thingy. It was delicious, and just made things seem a bit happier.

Bountys. I have eaten quite a few this week, I love the sweet coconut chocolatiness.

Hot running water, I love a good hot bath, and just being able to turn on a tap and hot water coming out, well, it's great really isn't it.

My Heavenly Father, loves me through everything, and knowing He walks through life's joys and trials with me, well, it's wonderful.

Friday, 10 February 2012

Little Tike's words

I know I'll forget what she could say at about 17 months, so this is my record.

The words she can say up to now...........

bamps ( gramps)
Antie ( Aunty)
choo choo ( train!)
Poo ( in your pants)
Pooh ( bear)
Pap ( nappy)
Row Row
Dudo ( Hugo)
Shish ( Lois)
Eyes ( Isaac)
pisps ( crisps)
Shide ( slide)
Amnals ( animals )
Bye Bye

There must be more, but these are all I can think of for now.

Week in Pictures

This weeks offerings, are an eclectic mix really. 

Precious moments on a Saturday morning.


Swinging around on a very chilly day. 

Cold window



Camera settings on from above photo....no time to change them.......this is what you get !

Waiting to make it to the wall

This time last year, my girl and her first sit in a high chair.

Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Ten on Tuesday

1. Turns out Currys is quite a good place to take a toddler on a Saturday afternoon, as long as you stick to the washing machine end. Lots of room to run,  not much to break. 
Little climb on an empty shelf.

2.  My sister got engaged at the weekend, to a very lovely man. I am one excited sister ! And Willow will be a flower girl  - cuteness.

3.  Painting took place today. Not so much about the paint on paper yet, far too tasty.

4.  When writing this I am realising that over the past few weeks I haven't done much, or thought about much outside toddler world. I need to bring a little more culture into my life, I have started reading a book that has no pictures and more than 10 pages, so that's a start I guess. You never know, one day I might make it to a concert or an Art gallery............?

5. Have taken up my love of eating biscuits again. Not so good for the waistline, but I figure i'll worry about that when I've finished popping out any kids we'r gonna have in a few years, and enjoy the calories for now. I do love a biscuit. These ones are amongst my favourite.

6.  It's half term next week, which is good for many reasons, but I always feel that you've broken the back of winter when you get to february half term, there is more daylight, and you can feel spring poking it's head around the corner and waving hello.

7.  Little Tike loves to hide in our curtains, 'hide' being one of her many new words. Just not sure how much more our curtain pole can take of being pulled before it leaves it's plasterboard plugs and falls to the floor.

8.  My Mum bought me a years subscription to 'red' magazine last year, and this months, there was an article which started ' struggling to decide which shade of grey to paint your living room'....? well yes actually, I am ! It then went on to list symptoms of being a 'decision phobic'.... mmmm I am a fairly decisive person, but maybe I have fallen at this hurdle. I have since decided on my shade of grey, and am hoping ( so desperately hoping) that Husbando will paint it in his week off work, and put up my lovely invisible book shelves which santa bought me. please, please, please.

9. Took Little tyke to an indoor play centre this week, she had climbed up to crawl across and go down the slide. I was chatting to another lady, and realised I hadn't seen her pop out the bottom, when I looked I could just see her little feet poking out. I went over, and there she was lying at the bottom of the slide, hands above, behind her head just lying down having a little look around. She's a funny little thing.

10.  On my tenth birthday I had a pineapple cake, shaped like a pineapple and tasted like a pineapple, just thought I'd share.

Hop on over to the other 'ten on tuesdayers'






Thursday, 2 February 2012

Week in pictures

I stupidly forgot to take my camera with us this weekend when we went out to a Moroccan longue for a meal, lots of lovely fabrics and lighting to clikedy click. But alas, so this weeks entries are the usual  everyday life with my Little Tike.

I love this one, yes it's fuzzy, but captures that just got out of bed, snotty face look which has summed her up this week.

Building, Building.

Lights, Lights - ah the joy of a 'sensory room' ( For those of you who've never been in one, this is what your taxes pays for ! )

Shiny sunshine came out to play

Anemones are trying their best.

Curse of the 'toxic childhood'........


Crayon on the floor, Crayon in the mouth, Crayon on the teeth, not so much on the paper....

Pretty playroom light.